I long to return to a time when pajama jeans didn't exist. Also, fuck Jumpin Jammerz. Future historian-fashionistas (in the future it will be a hyphenate, mark my words) will mark the advent of the Snuggie as the point in linear time when western culture began circling the drain. Women used to wear beautiful hats; men, tailored suits and Italian shoes. They dressed for travel, theatre, special events. It was a world with pants. A world with skirts. A world with shoes. A world with standards. Wearing pajamas in public trumpets to the whole world, "I'm here, and I don't care if you take me seriously! So what if I look totally unemployable? I'm COMFORTABLE." Not bothering to waste the 12 seconds it takes to pull a pair of big-boy pants over your ass, zip them, button them, then following the whole Cirque du Soleil-esque round of medieval torture with a shirt sans-hood...well, it speaks volumes about a person's character. You're an adult now, and for the sake of decency and self-respect, put down the Cinnamon Toast Crunch and get yourself dressed.
I hope you don't mind if I get personal on your ass for a minute, but I love getting dressed. It's honestly one of my favorite activities in my day. I've begun to appreciate the Mad Man aesthetic more and more, and my expensive-but-witty graphic tees are slowly migrating to the back of the closet, making ample room for tailored suits, sleek fitted button-downs, and their ilk. I'm 28, and do not intend to be one of those 30-something gay dudes who wears pre-distressed jeans and askew trucker caps. It's time to clean up just a bit (though you know I still leave those first three buttons open when I want...). In this spirit of style, I propose the idea of a boutonniere. This sexy, somewhat dark, and gorgeous piece fits perfectly.
Ah, anytime this subject comes up I get so, so sad. The hubs and I get dressed to the nines once a year for a $300 dinner and there are 30-something yuppies wearing flip flops and cargo shorts and TANK TOPS at the fanciest restaurant in town. And no one seems to care!
ReplyDeleteThis bout is fantastic, and so is the name of the company. Might be time to go shopping!